Find the Right Treatment For You!
My own treatment program (read all about it here) not only tells you why it happens but also shows you which treatments will be right for you.
This means you can solve the problem at home without the help of a doctor or professional sex therapist by doing what’s right for you.
How much time does it take? About half an hour, three times a week for several weeks. And you’ll need to practice some lovemaking techniques a bit from time to time to keep the benefits you’ve gained.
A partner’s help is needed in the later stages of the program. But even if you’re single, you should consider joining up – as well as solutions that cure delayed ejaculation, you’ll find lots of powerful information about the many different issues that can cause it.
There’s an eBook with 100+ pages of good solid sexual information, help in understanding your attitudes and feelings around sex, a description of every possible cause of the problem, a variety of ways to make sex great, and much more besides…. it’s like having your own sex therapist on hand, all the time, working one to one with you…. but much cheaper!
And – here’s the thing – my delayed ejaculation treatment program works for around 96% of the men who seriously commit to using it.
That means you can expect to have “normal” sex again in weeks. You’ll be able to ejaculate within ten or fifteen minutes of sex starting, depending on your choice of timing. And you’ll be able to enjoy intercourse to the full, with no inhibitions!
Now, here’s a bit more information about the various ways in which therapists, doctors and the like might approach delayed ejaculation.
Cognitive behavior therapy for men
Cognitive behavior therapy for delayed ejaculation is about finding techniques to overcome any inhibitions which are disabling a man’s ejaculatory ability – and also about “reframing” his attitudes and beliefs around sex.
That way, he’s more likely to enjoy successful sex (where “successful” obviously means he is able to ejaculate without undue difficulty).
So the basic idea is to identify new or more exciting sexual situations and sexual techniques that might enable a man with delayed ejaculation to overcome his sexual inhibitions, fears, anxieties and anger.
What is CBT ? – Video
The Erotic Flow – Slow Like A River!
Some of a man’s inhibitions and fears can be dealt with in what’s called the “erotic flow” of a couple’s sexual interaction, while others need to be “creatively avoided”.
One powerful aspect of treatment is to increase the level of a man’s erotic stimulation. That can be done by finding particular types of stimulation that act as orgasm triggers for the man (e.g. testicular or anal stimulation).
And it’s equally important to change a man’s thinking around sex so that he regards it as something he can enjoy while he becomes more and more aroused, naturally achieving ejaculation at the climax of arousal.
For example, this might be as simple as showing the man how to ask his partner for an increased level of intimacy, or to ask for certain types of erotic play during sexual interaction.
Video about male sexual arousal
How It Works
Any cognitive-behavioral approach is made up of three parts:
- first, the couple act as an intimate sexual team
- second, they are comfortable with their mutual sexual activity
- third, they achieve a higher level of erotic stimulation and/or sensitivity to stimulation.
When a couple is working together as an intimate team, rather than as “the man pleasuring the woman”, the man feels much less performance pressure.
And since foreplay leading to intercourse always involves two people, mutual involvement in foreplay (and in becoming aroused and in the sexual response cycle) is necessary to achieve greater intimacy of any kind.
This greater intimacy can overcome sexual inhibition and the isolating effect of the man withdrawing into his own inner erotic world.
The Sexual Response Cycle Of Men And Women
Men with delayed ejaculation often have long-lasting and hard erections which are not necessarily a sign of a high level of arousal – and certainly not of their emotional readiness for sexual intercourse.
But couples in this situation often believe that the man’s erection indicates that it’s time to start sexual intercourse.
(After all, a hard erection equals sexual arousal, right? Well, no, not always!)
A much better approach is to show the couple how to enjoy different types of sexual pleasure. That way, ejaculation is the ultimate outcome when they both reach the highest point of their sexual arousal.
This all helps a man to get more confident about sex with his partner – and also about asking for various types of sexual stimulation, experiencing different kinds of stimulation, and learning to enjoy the erotic feelings that result.
When his confidence in his own sexual ability and sexual power increases to the point where he can be more “selfish”, he’ll experience the higher levels of personal sexual arousal that are necessary to easily achieve orgasm.
You see, too many men with delayed ejaculation think that sex is all about their partner’s pleasure.
But that’s the wrong approach – sex is about both partners’ pleasure, and each of them is responsible for asking for what they want…. and getting it.
Two basic techniques that play a major role in cognitive-behavioral therapy for delayed ejaculation are using more than one kind of stimulation and awareness of the man’s orgasm triggers.
So the man should receive many different types of stimulation – this could include the use of fantasy, stimulation of his anus or testicles during sexual intercourse, stimulation of the partner’s breasts or other bodily areas, “dirty talk”, and so on.
Since orgasm triggers are highly individual, they can perhaps be identified most easily during masturbation or sensual play.
Such sensual play (which is fully described, like all the rest of the techniques mentioned here, in my treatment program) is a fundamental part of cognitive-behavioral interventions for retarded ejaculation.
It also provides a good opportunity to identify ways in which a man can be more easily stimulated to orgasm.